Stephen Fleming Local Guide
9 Dec 2023
Dear Esteemed Veterans and Dental Comrades,
If you're in the market for a dental experience that doubles as a test of your patience and a throwback to the era when snail mail was faster than customer service, then the Michael E. DeBakey VA Medical Center Dental Clinic is your utopia.
First off, let's talk about appointment scheduling – it's like playing a game of "Where's Waldo?" but with dates. With a modest six-month waiting period, you have ample time to reflect on your life choices, grow a magnificent beard (even if you're unable to), or learn a new language. It's the perfect opportunity to embrace the art of waiting.
Attempting to reschedule? The department's phone is akin to a mythical creature - often talked about, but never seen (or heard, in this case). It's a masterclass in playing hard-to-get, and let me tell you, they are winning.
Now, let's waltz over to the front desk - where time and efficiency go to enjoy a long, leisurely vacation. The staff there, bless their hearts, have transformed the mundane task of patient interaction into a rare event, much like a solar eclipse. Instead, they focus on the more critical task of dissecting the latest gossip. Their dedication to not answering the phone while exploring the depths of their cell phones is truly commendable. It's like watching live performance art where the theme is "The Evolution of Procrastination."
During my time there, I often wondered if I had accidentally walked onto the set of a sitcom where the punchline is always "Not today, patient!" But no, it was real life, just flavored with a hint of existential dread and a sprinkle of dark humor.
In conclusion, if you're seeking a dental clinic that defies the boundaries of time and customer service, look no further. The Michael E. DeBakey VA Medical Center Dental Clinic is a place where dreams (and occasionally, teeth) may not be fulfilled, but hey, at least it's never dull. One star due to the fact that if you are lucky enough to not need much in the way of care, you might be ok with this level of service.
Yours in eternal waiting,
A Patient Patient
